This is a response to SNL/The Lonely Island's Natalie Portman Rap. Ryan was quite saddened to learn she has a p*n*s. Lyrics: We're sitting here today with idiot Ryan Reyes Natalie (yes) what the hell's wrong? Confess, was it PMS singing on that song (no) Let's hang out! Give me a call! You better not have an angry cyclops between two balls Now I feel like Eminem's Stan Stressed and depressed, are you a man? Is there a pistol in your holster? Is that why they cut the full frontal from 'Closer'? (Do you really want to know?) Yes! (Do you really want to know?) I just said! (Is that what you want?) What's with this suck my d*ck gibberish? V is for Vagina, lick my clitoris! I know all there is to know about the Crying Game I've had my share of the Crying Game 'Cause my heart's Broke, what? Back Mountain What? Damn! Natalie I bet you woulda found Osama Queen Amidala (Evie Hammond) Hot Momma! Whatever it is they call ya, you're so cute! Harvard, a vegan, and a good actor too! I bet you can spontaneously combust on que But real quick what's with bald chicks saying (Suck my d*ck!) Well, I guess it sells tickets and licorice You put the P.H. in filth, lick my clitoris! What a wicked thing to do to make me dream of you What a wicked game to play to make me feel this way Natalie, I'm not crazy, I'm not an obsessed fan I just wanna walk hand in hand with you in the sand I'll gladly do your laundry, watch Dirty Dancing Here's an idea, a doppleganger tag team! (Ideas are bullet proof) And this is the truth, unless I'm way off (chaos) You want to quit this stardom sh*t & take the day off (all the time) So you can spend it with me topless at the beach Screaming suck my d*ck to paparazzi! (Do you understand what I'm telling you?) Yeah, Britney style bee-itches! F*ck you! (Sorry about that little interuption there) (Believe me Natalie, listen Natalie, this is) (The fifth...) (Living side by side in peace) (...of November) (Remember) The mashup includes footage/music from V For Vendetta, The Crying Game, G.I. Jane, Closer, The Upside Of Anger, The Killers, John Lennon, Queen, Chris Isaak, Johnny Cash, Brokeback Mountain, George Bush, the war in Iraq, & Natalie Portman's Rap with original music by King Barf.